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23 May 2020 @ 01:29 am
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19 January 2014 @ 03:33 am
Hello to all faithful readers and fellow writers,

It is with great sadness that I announce that although I have hoped for a long time that my muse will reunite with me, it seems that it isn't going to happen anytime soon.  And so with a heavy heart I now give my unfinished fics up for adoption to those who feel they can give it credit, creativity and most of all the love that I originally gave into them.

Also, if any of my fics have inspired someone the will to give them a sequel, then I am willing to also give them away if that person gives me a decent follow up to what has already been written.

I have been thinking of this for a very long time, wishing and wishing that my muse would return and that I would be able to continue my writing myself, but it seems that unfortunately that doesn't appear to be likely to happen any time soon.

Now, these stories are things that I have given my heart, mind and soul to so I will not give them away lightly.  Anyone who wishes to take up the mantle will have to give me good reason to assign then the duty of giving my stories a brilliant conclusion.  So, anyone who wishes to take up this responsibility, I ask that you send me a message here at LJ or email me at lycaness@hotmail.co.uk with your ideas and reasons why I should trust you to give my work the diligence that I originally put into them.  I will also share my original designs as to where I planned to take each story and their characters.  I would very much hope that if anyone wishes to take on the role that they will respect said plans as much as they are able with their own creative ideas.

To those who were hoping I would finish these stories myself, I give my heartfelt apologies and beg your forgiveness.  As you can see from the timeline, this is not something I have done on a whim but something I have battled with for years.  I am close to tears as I write this as I had sincerely wished that I would be able to finish what I started and have done for a long time, but there comes a point where everyone has to admit defeat.

And so, again, anyone who wishes to take up where I left of and thinks that they can do my stories justice, please contact me by PM here at LJ or at lycaness@hotmail.co.uk with the story you wish to take on or make a sequel to and your ideas as to where you wish to take it.  All responses will be answered and any final decisions will be posted here before said author is allowed to post anything.  With that said, I will ask that if anyone sees anything posted by anyone who doesn't have permission in my journal, please do let me know either in comments, PM or by email, it would be very much appreciated.

Thank you all so very much for your dedication to my stories, I love you all and again I apologies for not being able to be the one to finish what I started as I had to desperately hoped.

Lyca xxx

Current Mood: crushedcrushed
18 January 2011 @ 11:20 pm
Part Ten BCollapse )
11 October 2010 @ 10:01 pm
Jensen sat on the cold floor of the kitchen, not even feeling the chill sweep through his body.  He was numb against everything but the agony in his heart.  He felt useless, nothing, like if he didn't exist the world would be a better place without him.  All he brought was pain and fear and if he just wasn't there anymore then everyone he cared about could just mourn him and them move on with their lives.

He stared at the knife in his hand, the sharp blade that would be gleaming if the light were a little brighter.  He had sharpened it especially, knowing it would bite through his flesh easily and with little pain.  In the back of his mind was the thought that he was being stupid and weak, but over the last week he had felt the pressure building inside him, getting stronger and stronger, ready to explode and he knew he needed the release.

With a glance, he looked at the phone beside him, knowing he should pick it up, make that call for help, someone to stop him, but not a single molecule in his body allowed him to reach for it, like it wasn't even a possibility.  Tears streamed down his face at the hopelessness he felt as he put the blade to his wrist, pushing it gently at first agaisnt the skin.  This was it, this would be the last time, he just couldn't do this anymore, couldn't feel like this anymore.  He pushed, feeling the sharp bite as the blade cut through his skin.

He didn't hear the door opening, but when he heard the sharp gasp all he could think of was "thank God".  Then his relief turned to shame as Jared skidded to his knees beside him, ripping the knife away and pulling Jensen into his arms, hanging on for dear life.

"I'm sorry," Jensen whispered, his voice almost dull, belying the tears that soaked his cheeks.

"It's okay, baby, it's okay," Jared spoke into his hair, laying kisses over his head.  "I'm here, and it's okay."

"What's wrong with me, Jay?  Why do I feel like this?" Jensen begged for understanding because he sure didn't understand it.  He had everything in the world to live for and yet he felt like he was collapsing into himself.

"I don't know, but we'll figure it out, I promise," Jared swore, his voice as strong as the arms that held Jensen tight, not letting go and giving Jensen the strength he needed to get through another night.

Jensen let his tired eyes fall closed, the feelings not gone, but dormant for the moment. Jared was here.  He was loved.  He had a reason to go on... until the next time...